The ambiguity between two ‘R’s-rescue/rehab and an ‘L’-legalize!!

Its just now, that I now bumped into an youtube link shared by one of my classmates and a senior onto facebook, I’m intending to write this piece!!

The speech of Dr. Sunitha Krisnan is so engaging that I actually took an effort to google her and checked out Prajwala, her organization. Listening to her speech, which was by the way took place in Mysore Infosys, 2009 for some event or so, I got nostalgic about my days at Prayas-when I was working with a Government home for adult trafficked victim in Chembur and interestingly it again intrigued my mind towards the most discussed debate: rehabilitation of sexworker or legalizing it. Since my very first real field exposure was with Durbar, which pioneered the venture of legalizing sex work, I always took the position of legalization and argued everywhere for it. But honestly speaking I was never sure. I could see the pros and cons of both the side and answering this question have always been a tough call. Nevertheless, I advocated the “L” word abandoning the “R” word!! I have always asked people, what will they eat? How are you going to rehabilitate them? How many will you rehabilitate?? And that has always been question for me. So I always hated forceful rescue of adult sexworkers working in brothels, which is pretty rampant in Bombay, as I have seen those women-neither they are gonna get accepted back home, nor they have any place to go and eventually they have only place to go is their good old rooms of brothels. Unfortunately our government has a typical tendency of banning something which poses a so called “moral” threat to the society by not creating sufficient means of their survival. The burning example: banning bar dance!! The other day a friend of mine was saying ‘you know these places u will get to see a lot of ‘pros’, the beautiful ones, those who used to be bar gals…’ and I sighed. The gals who used to dance and seldom used to sleep with the guests of those hotels/bars are now exposed to the full fledged prostitution. Thanks to our government. They did big deal for the bar gals. May be the business have been closed. But the people or the situation which drove those gals into the illuminated darkness of bars, are yet alive. If not bars, another B awaits for you gal... brothel!!

Today Dr Krishnan’s speech actually made me ponder over some undecided thouhts. She is a crusader of Anti human trafficking and rescues people from sexual slavery. Yes, for her sex work is actually sexual slavery!! I am afraid that if the sex workers of Durbar get to meet her, those fatty energetic peer educators and she might indulge into a cat fight!! But jokes apart, Durbar always claimed sex work is equivalent to entertainment work and thus sex worker should get the status of entertainment worker, so no rehabs, give us the rights!! Cool demand, but I have observed a distinctive pattern in the lives of the sex workers: drove in to sex work, sold or tricked and ended up in the gullies of brothels. Initially no one was ready to do that. And mostly the pimps are ready to let them go only under one condition, if they can pay off the selling amount. By the time they earn or gather that money by obviously selling the body every evening, they are seasoned with this profession. They can’t go back as Krishnan pointed out rightly, ‘its nice to talk about them, but not nice to take them back home’!! I agree with her, that more painful is isolation, stigma and ostracization because of your victimization than being the victim itself. And that’s how they become truly professional sexworker. Ironically, in my study, no sex worker have ever said that she wants to continue this trade, if given a suitable alternative option and no one likes to see her daughter in this trade. This dichotomy always prevailed in my mind- if it’s an entertainment work, an art, just like any other performing art, then it should incorporate some passion and enjoyment, like artists of circus for example or the magicians; but why this trade is tagged with such agony and pain? I guess the saga of those pains gets muted under the huge and expensive national/ international sex workers conferences, rallies and dharnas!

Rights for the sex workers are important, very important indeed, but perhaps the best possible option would have been rehab of all who are willing to come out of it- a true utopic call, I know. Thus, its better to give them rights than to ban, if not (realistic and client friendly) rehabilitation !!!

Intoxication of illicit indulgence

The stay
Lately my Bombay trips have become fairly mono centric. No matter how grave the objective is, the hidden agenda has always remained Bala- a friend who often turns up as a mentor by turns me off time and again!!
Thus in Bombay, while Kandelivelli east comes up as the most legitimate and convincing station for stay, Bandra has become an irresistible destination to purge out the subdued desires and emotions all at once!! Bala’s big shot donor agency position and brand IRMA always help me to buy in my family that the guy is of big help in terms of professional development……. some thing which barely happened during our eerie rendezvous at Kartar road, Kalanagar or prolonged rick rides !!

But the last Bombay trip has actually changed all these dynamics at once and for all! Considering the convenience, I decided to stay up with another friend of mine who happens to be a guy! He is an ‘almost-childhood-friend’ thus I described the stay to my overtly concerned friends as : Safety ensured!! Even Tupur, who has always been a strong support to my all so called illicit activities, sounded dubious- “who’s the guy? And how come u’re staying with some one else when Bala is in Bombay??!!” Her reaction was prompt and logical as the almost child hood friend is not such a close one. The fact that he’s Ria’s classmate and a very special friend of Ritu- have made his presence prominent in our peer discussion and that’s all !! So perhaps it has been a desperate call from my part and may be li’l shocking from his part too!
2 sleepless nights together changed it for good!

Handful of lie, mugful of coffee
After having a nice Punjabi dinner with refreshing Bacurdi rum, Bala dropped me near Vashi station: I could see from the distance…the black tee guy with black Pulsar….inevitably it had to be Subhabrata, my almost childhood friend!!
Chal coffee khai – was the first phrase from him and the journey started off! ( oops I still remember, because some how I was anxious in my sub conscious mind- how to initiate the conversation or what to say actually). Settling down at CCD, my first task was to call up my parents and giving them some bluffs about my stay in a stupid hostel in Mumbai central and its whereabouts! Surprisingly I didn’t feel bad about it (how mean of me!!)….as I could remember Tupur’s word in one of those literary letters…. “echhe kore aro ekbar mayer dike ekmutho mithyee chure di.. echhe kore aro ekbar fire jai” (wish I could throw another handful of lie to my mom.. wish I could go back again…) Thus, I was sort of cherishing my attempt of trying to reach those time……when we had crazy dreams to live life on our own bizarre terms…the unforgettable days of Jadavpur University…the time when we hardly used to differentiate between a guy and a gal….a time when no Ahemednagar reaped any fear within me… that ‘something disastrous’ can also happen in the process of all these…so going back and being unleashed was the Mantra….and it reigned large in me!

Night 1: CSR mania and Sandipan
First night I was supposed to sleep early, dog tired by a non ac 32 hrs journey amidst maddening crowd and scorching heat and a prestigious admission test in TISS; but we called it a night only at 4 ! Discussion started with photography, about his new semi SLR and its amazing bulb mode, and then it turned towards Sandipan Chtoopadhaya and his bizarre creation…the adolescent memories with those books…the pain the neysha and many more such incidents; which somehow nurtured the anecdotal gelling of our gang in Kolkata…my true self…my root! Finally we caught up with social work! (What an irony! Discussing social work with a Chemical Engineer) pleasure of working for society …..irritation of working for the same, when it becomes u’r bread and butter… difference between a CSR (corporate social responsibility) and NGO…..Jan Vikash and his Sunday painting attributes… discussion went on and on…..fading away my tension of what to say and Subhabrata’s plea to remain silent (which by then he has already told me) until I spelt out abruptly : Ami ghumalam !! (I’m off to sleep)

Night 2: Robert Langdon and the Omelet
That day could be truly said as celebration over flunking!! I screwed up my paper big time but was happy to spend a Friday nite in a metro like Bombay, with a moderately cool chap…with whom by then I have made reasonably considerable frendship !! So somehow I was waiting for the interview to get over and really didn’t want to think a shit about the whole admission process, rather 10 times call to Subhabrata to fix the venue for a happening evening ahead indeed came up as a matter of grave concern.
Bala had to rush to Pune that nite and our plan to visit Leo pole Café got abandoned and strangely somehow, for the first time I was in a mood to say “never mind”!!
The start was pretty mundane, he took me to a plush shopping mall…Palm village…poor me, I thought it would be some sort of mock shack like joint but….alas!! I chanted a brief n silent curse to him - why in shopping mall? But some how I realized that shopping mall is an inevitable destination to escape in today’s era, so Subhabrata is behaving just perfect and normal!! But soon the course of freak out changed and we discovered ourselves with green apples ( liquid form) and smokes!! That was the start I guess, which followed by some more green apple with magic touchy moments…..a long bike ride to catch a multiplex show ( again shopping mall…phew)…..Omelet dinner at 10.30…..caramel popcorn desert at 12.30 and again a plan of having Omelet at 2….and so on and so forth….!! Setting down in his mystic apartment at around 2.30 was not the end of the day; rather…it was the show after interval….and the show was quite rocking, where for the first time I indulged and enjoyed into some more illegal deeds ( cherishable cherry)!! (which otherwise always made me puke!!) But some how it was his magical company or the magic of the time
(magic moment !!) that I survived that nite, with some innovative visionary images like turning of red 0 power to square n flatten one…..beautiful eyes of him ( he by the way very proud of which) to a black dark socket ( a vision imprinted in my brain from Landon’s Angel n d devil’s famous scene of papal autopsy) and his face to Air’s !! (God last one was the dreadfully deadly)…… (And I was struggling to focus on his face….trying to reinforce the fact, that this chap is Subhabrata…by no means is Ari)!!

Conclusion
Next morning which was supposed to be great as Bala was supposed to return from pune and we are supposed to have blast actually turned out pretty simple….bland and mundane than Subhabrata’s kind attempt of taking me to the shopping malls!! Only there was two incidents worth to pen down: I fell down from a steep stair at Bandra ( stonned me !!) and the “coveted” afternoon I spent with Bala at his lonely apartment was literally speechless(mute) from my part…me half dozed off lying on the sofa and he passionately watching Monorama under 6 feet ….!!

Epilogue
I didn’t screw up my paper so badly as the kind TISS faculty at last considered me for the course and after 2 months of that trip I got a call letter to come to Bombay for joining the course,
I am quite settled in Bombay now and enjoying a typical metro life, Bala and me suddenly became very busy and we have never managed to find time to meet up or catch up a good conversation over phone,
Subhabrata is continuing his stay in that mystic apartment with all zero power light arrangement and old monkis habit,
but there is difference now- I have lost the track of counting; how many sleepless nights we have spent together, over illicit intoxicated indulgence !!

Ari like….

Prelude to Bangalore trip

The other day I went to Bangalore (as if Bangalore is just an hrs distance from my place) for an interview. My first call in Bangalore! Ahem Bangalore!! (my friends, family and the interviewers too has occurred to find my “vested interest” for the city)

To do away the pressure of interview, this time also I have taken the trip as another opportunity of spending a weekend in a plush city! Well considering the small town amenities of Hazaribagh and 7.30-go-the-bed-culture, my inclination and excitement towards spending weekend in metros should not bring any sarcastic smile to any one I guess!!

Night one and Vijay Mallya touch

The first night went quite bellow the expectation, as these days people have masteterd the task of "Communifaking" !! (The faking art in communication). Thus the cousin’s cousin who seemed to be very polite and kind and warm over telephone, turned out quite a cold and formal creature ! (Of course it was my fault, I should not have bought in the soft talks of a gal who actually flies…that too for no ghati ones…kingfisher classic…the very airways with Maliya Touch!!) Zeera rice and a mere smoke shared by two of us after a confused auto ride from Zaxandra signal to her place at 12 o clock in the night marked a mundane start of the week end !!

Treasure hunt for the interview, Dr. Anand and time calculation
Saturday was scheduled for interview and again to my woe, I made a treasure hunt to reach the exact destination observing one after another landmark- Cox town InfoTech...St Thomas Town Post office…beauty parlor….Fish shop…3rd Cross road and so on and on…….
(With my terrible road sense as Ari says Talakana, three beauty parlor in the 3rd cross road and the same auto driver who doesn’t know anything about Bangalore…I had a memorable day start!!)

I screwed up the interview as usual, but that’s not the talking point as interviews hardly matters…its all about having fun in Bangalore…..but since Ari is not in the country, my Bangalore trip from the beginning only becomes a bland cuisine! My only friend in the city, whom I am in touch with, is Dr. Anand Sagar Udagii, met only once in a Workshop at Pune, a year back. Never do I shared any intimacy with him, but still he being the only option, I banked upon his company entirely and dreamed of spending the Sat eve with him …while enjoying the glittering weekend ambience of M.G. Road !! (Some how I was convinced that he drinks and all…so pubbing would not be a tough call…I thought ...Ahem!)

My interview got over by 1’o clock and the generous FVTRS people offered lunch, that too a non veg Chinese stuff so, I was done by 1.30pm! ( Miss calculation !!! I thought it would be at least till 3’o clock)

My trusted friend to enjoy weekend in Bangalore , said will make himself free by 5.30 pm in the evening…and everytime I spoke to him he never forgot to mention that he will “make himself free”….oh! I am honored…but still killing the time from 1.30- 5.30 is not a joke…specially when u’re alone in an unfamiliar city and relativity theory rulez high!!

M.G. Road and The heavenly call
I cursed myself silently for not informing the trip to Subhobroto, a lately close friend, who is supposed to arrive on Sunday in Bangalore and could have come on Sat, if I would have informed…..I moaned over the fact that Ari is abroad and wished he never left …wondering weather there could be a possibility of going to Mysore to meet Ari’s friends or what could be other possible alternatives out here to spend the time till 5.30!! (finally, the last one came up as the most realistic consideration)
M.G Road…I decided to go to M.G. Road to kill my time as Shopping mall and affinity towards materialism has developed an efficacy to cushion solitude and depression!! It has always worked in several people’s case, including me, provided one is ready to compromise another material stuff: “money”!!

To add one some more interesting plan to my M.G. Road Loitering, I gave a call to Debashish….our own sweet Deba, who besides being Ari’s roomie, is my closest friends boy friend!! So Deba has always been a ghorer chele and he answered my call by a loud: “Hello…ha bol? Amra Bangalore e!” ….oh God….his words come up so heavenly to me…as if some one has offered me a job in Bangalore…in an organization like FVTRS…with a lucrative salary and lots of travel!! But for me it was only the question of killing time…so why Deba’s call sounded so delightful to me? Why?

Why? Y is the word……..
Deba was not alone, Anindya (Mote) was also there , who is a nice fellow , specially in comparison to several other BE college brute like ones…and we scheduled the meeting at Koramongola Forum, where they were already having lunch at KFC!! Sitting in the auto I was conscious and anxious enough to reach there at mimimum time. But Y? I was supposed to kill time by any means…but with every traffic signal, I could palpate the restlessness within me, the eagerness to meet them as soon as possible….The EXACT feeling which used to play inside me, when I’m out to see Ari, in Kolkata!! Well I might be longing for a smoke…and thus when I met them, that was the first thing I uttered : Aamay ekta cigarette de…!!
So three of us sat on the low height boundary of the shopping mall and had our due share. I was little doubtful that whether I created any nuisance in their weekend plan at B’lore, but somehow I felt having me around they are not so bugged up !! My sense of happiness grew higher! They asked every possible things about the interview…and finally.. inevitably we knew our destination.. pub or a drinking joint !! Mote spelt it out: “Daru Khabo” !
First we were looking for an economic joint, but in Forum the only option remained : Firangi Paani- an overtly expensive one. Failed to found anything else we decided to step in! In between we have several discussions…over many things…and surprisingly Mote talks exactly the similar way of Ari’s. The gestures and body languages and usage of innovative phases, which I used to think Ari’s ethnicity was actually not so, Mote is so very likely to Ari and to some extent Deba too, atleast when comes the use of phase like : Tui ke ?? ( instead of Tui ki?)!!

While sitting with that Big mugful of beer (shared form an expensive pithcher), I was feeling so happy and contended, that I felt Anand should come only. (How mean of me…the guy who’s gonna make himself free for my sake…who is actually my friend and with whom I planned of spending the evening….comes up as a burden to me)…its like dismissing those long planned programmes and meet ups with frends just on a phone call of Ari !! Here they were no Ari, but the way of thinking were just alike. But why?

The mean side of me and the realization
However, I decided to be less mean by chucking out my happiness over the commitment. But as I finished the my mug ( of which Deba took a big sip …though he had one and half and me only one)….I decided to be mean!! We planned it like…if Anand is upto drink, we will drink together and spent some time together and I will finish my shoe shopping with him, meanwhile they will go to M. G. road for Camera shopping and join me later!! But sadly enough Anand doesn’t smoke or drink!! ( I was wondering what extent of fun I am about to experience, if these two roomies of Ari and superbly charming guys were in Bangalore that evening)

I spend almost 2 hrs with Anand…but my heart always craved for them…just it craves for Ari in a similar situation!! So was it because of their Ari like gestures and body languages that I enjoyed and longed for.. or is it the way I like my friends to be…but they were not my friends!! My friend was Anand ! They were precisely his B. E. college friends and his room mates…even when Subroto came and joined us in the late evening or rather I joined three of them …nothing changed!! I thoroughly enjoyed their company as if Ari is around and I believe, if he would have been, I would have not said a single more or different thing…..( leaving alone the mushy stuffs)and it could have been tipically similar…jus like Mote’s and Ari’s behavioral similarities! I positioned my self on the cloud 9 perfectly !!

Ari is not so happy with my if-i-get-d-job shift to Bangalore ! He’s afraid that I might force him to settle in that over crowded city …and he wont be in a position to make me happy…..but without discussing Ari or our relation a single time we made so much of would-have /could-have plans…if I get the job in Bnagalore…the weekends together…boozing together at their Mysore house while eating Bengali foods and listening to the musics….whether Ari will be there or not…has never been counted….as if they are my friends too.. or even if they are not my friends, they were only trying to be polite and decent to Janowaar’s Bou, I do admit they are great dudes…… far better than my other stupid friends…who says Bengali’s are Fattoos….

E.O.D….Deba is a sweet heart and FRIENDS in Mysore
Thanks Deba…for showing the respect…not to choose that “madan bar” for my sake and heading towards the overpriced firangi paani….but I promise this year pujo…we won’t go for any experimentation…u don’t have to get ripped off while stepping out from any some place else with a mere single drink….good old Opium zindabaad!!

While bidding them Good bye at Bangalore city Junction…some how, even after enjoying the weekend, I was not feeling complete…suddenly the interview became a serious issue…I craved for the job like nothing before.. I prayed to God for the first time ever since I am into this interview process….
Besides being close to Ari….now a job in Bangalore means Friends (not the star world soap)…with whom I sensed a strange anecdotal connection…..Bangaliyana u can say !!

A confession

The thanks…
I never liked him; when we used to meet almost everyday! Discussing him has always been a favorite pass time for all of us. But during the end of first year, we the gals of CSRD 2005-07 batch thanked him like hell coz he threw us out from the “ancient stable shape” hostel! And we got the chance to breathe in Ahmednagar for the first time. His penalty for our protest before NAC committee showed up as the biggest bonus that any gal form CSRD could ever imagine!!

Let me introduce him….
Well, I am talking about Sudhir Sharma-the celebrated principal of Center for Studies of Rural Development, Ahmednagar….the man behind my admission in the college and for that I never got tired of cursing him during my days of CSRD!!

Marks bonanza…..
But he loved me or pretended to be so, as we knew that he was a genuine diplomat with perfect sense of bureaucracy. However, I never loved him, but given him the due respect or pretended to give so. But honestly, enjoyed the attention he used to pay towards me. I can still remember the day when I went to know the internal marks of Communication paper he taught: I peeped into his mighty office and merely said a word… ‘Marks’…
he smiled and replied 18!!
[18 out of 20 was a sheer miracle if consider the quality of my paper. I was smart enough to understand that ‘a preference’ is being bestowed upon me by him…..]

“Why Kafka?”
Then we left college. I can remember my last day of Ahmednagar. Me and my roomie Verna broke all possible rules and attempted every illicit to celebrate the last day and in the process I forget to say a good bye to the mighty principal. I can only remember that he was very busy with his new favorite student, (who happens to be my once upon a time best friend) and CNI delegates ……..I did not feel like bothering him either. So I really can’t remember our last meeting. But surely the first….the PI time of the admission process, when to my surprise he actually took interest in my favorite author Franz Kafka!!

The tech connection…….
Coming back to Kolkata, he was the only one from Ahmednagar faculty with whom I spoke. Be it Christmas wishing or confirmation of my University Topper Status, his was the only number I could dial. Surprisingly I never made a single communication attempt with any of my favorite faculties. I kind of used to avoid Nagar, but Sharma was an exception. So connection established through gmail. And we got in touch with each other. The once disliked principal became a reliable information source of CSRD and Pune University.

Going Pune……
January 1st week I visited Pune for that Gold Medal ceremony. Before that we exchanged thousand mails and planned my trip to Nagar. Then I did not go. Actually I could not. But I could have let him know that. (Alas!!) Came back with the medal, a month or so passed, but I never wrote him (I wish I would). Intended for thousand times, but then it never happened, partly due to my laziness and partly for some unknown reason. And then he is gone. Forever.


sharma.sudhir@gmail.com ……………
Dead person’s mail in the inbox was a kind of new experience. There’s lot still there afresh filled with information, warm exchanges….. and the last one contains the news of his Heart Attack, a sent to all sort behalf of his family!!!
Wish I could write a mail to sharma.sudhir@gmail.com once again, feel like sending a ping to that Sudhir Sharma available status at late nite ….feel like sending that photo, me taking medal from chancellor…..dial that number once again and say sorry that I could not make it this time, but will do surely for June…………….
Wish he is still there sitting in that office……..


Epilogue……….
The other day I went to Shantineketan for PhD entrance exam. I was the only outsider among thousand internal candidates. When all were busy in cramming up the formula of Central tendency and Chi square, the HOD came out and got engaged in the pet conversation with the ex students…pretty ordinary scene but some how I felt so damn left out and...
the college I never owned by heart, the principal for whom I possess no love ever, cling my heart….. for the first time in my life I missed CSRD……… I missed my campus…… I missed Sharma sir.
Well I can always get back to CSRD, I can always loiter in that campus…..but if only I could meet Sharma sir once again……………
And today while doing this write up, I feel like crying for him for the first time…..
I think, I have no other way to pay respect to him but to confess what I used to feel about him during those days…
The repentance of not meeting him in Jan will remain anchored in my heart, nonetheless!!

We stand by Mumbai…….A playful Gimmick or a powerful Gesture?!

They say civil society is awaking. And thus proactive role of citizens against any misdeed is not a rare affair these days. Perhaps candle lit peace march is one of those celebrated protest gestures among many and I don’t know whether this apparent somber touched candle lit marches are actually some replicated version of a highly emotive scene backed up by a suitable background score of A. R. Raheman,
from the movie- Rang De Basanti .

Well, I am not trying to be skeptical about these protest marches or similar moves by the civil society, rather, I always felt bad when I heard of such moves against a cause which I too strongly support and could no take part in it, simply because of some lethargic (read laayd) habits. Then visualizing the live or delayed coverage of those events and glancing on the front or mid page of the newspaper has always made me frowned silently; while cursing myself even more silently: I should have gone!! However, I have never shown up, neither during Rizwanur Episode, nor during the Nandi gram issue!

But I have always appreciated those attempts and recently was just bewildered while listening to several people’s appeal for joining a peace march in front of Victoria Memorial through a typical late night Radio show, which is known for its RJ’s mystical voice and romantic aura.

But two repeated experience of witnessing those candle lit protest march from outside the “michil” had evaporated all respects of mine from the civil society’s protest gimmick and perhaps that’s the reason the write up starts with a dubious tone.

The first experience was to see a really long rally of school children, which caused an elaborate traffic jam in Taratala and adjoining James Long bypass, while I was also stuck inside an auto. At first I could not gauge what is happening and to see the blissful attitudes of the children, I thought they are heading for some sports event or so. The posters and unlit candles barely signified any thing and were actually coverd up by their smiling face and candid approach. Then finally I realized it’s against the Mumbai Attack……….!!
Trust me, that protest march has only evoked appalled irritation towards the whole event which perpetually hit the alleged authority. I guess many like me, who stuck in that traffic would have possessed the same thought!!

The second experience was less troublesome and more shocking as this time it was an adult group upholding banner of Pranayam guru Ravi shankar along with the posters : We stand by Mumbai; heading towards the Dhakuria Lake through Goal Park. Joyful features, with a muffled chatted voice- could easily be the bottom line to describe that Protest march!! Well, from the distance, it was an eye catcher as you won’t get to see the detailed movement of the participants but flickering beams of candle light stood well contrasted with the night’s attire. Here also, the carefree nature of the procession hardly symbolized the protest or mourning for the 26/11 Mumbai incident, rather it helped the non participant pedestrians to cross the wide juncture of Goal park, peacefully. I was no exception, when I on looked the most shocking or the most hilarious incident : A white salwar clad young lady took a sharp cut from the procession and about to leave, when she was caught by another lady screaming “ don’t u dare to leave” and the smart deviant for some reason joined the rally again with a mischievous smile!!

I really did not know how to react and the first time I praised myself for not attending those protest marches as I was never fully inspired to exhibit my protest in public. And I congratulate all those lazy types like me, who never felt motivated enough to move out to take part in this sort of Gimmick!! May be walking down a long way in a resentful manner is pretty boring, specially for school children, but I could not understand the attempt of taking part / forced to take part in a movement which’s purpose is not at all internalized and in the process perverting the purpose itself.

Well, I am sorry, if I hurt the civil society, who takes these apparent simple looked protest moves in a real serious manner, which actually I believe has significant implications, but I find no word to despise these people, who indulge themselves into the mockery of suffered Mumbaikers through their so called “Protest moves” and “candle lit marches”in a chill-pill mood…!!

kolkata korcha

the city which makes our identity
creates our ethnicity
where we have known eachother..
where we have loved each other....
touched eachother..........

and want to come back forever
a city full of dust...crowd...traffic....
oh how we hated it
oh how we loved it
a city of full life....a city of joy
Kolkata....our envoy

Hyderabad Blues

Prologue

It was a shabby huge hall just before you step out from the fort. We were pretty exhausted and contended with the happy hour alcohol and climbing top of the fort and merely interested to see any more things, when Sandeep made me stood at an angular corner of the hall and placed himself quickly onto the other end asking me to press my ear against the cold wired wall….” Debo can u listen to me?” yup.. Pretty clear I answered back; startled completely by the architecture of the room, but then there was something more flattering: “Debo will u marry me?”…An ever craving phrase hit upon my ear!! Never in my life have I imagined I would get a marriage proposal like this….

The call

I got the call at an odd hour of my work, when I was out to field at a tacky corner of Razabazar, taking swift lunch of prohibited beef biriyani- an angry voice puffed in: Are u coming or not? And the fainted tint of my Hyderabad trip arrayed back as a torment in the middle of my “convincing doc s programme” (yea, my pride of working in a Nation wide programme of National AIDS Control Organization to prevent Sexual Diseases for the wider benefit of India’s latest concern HIV & AIDS has now come to a mere doc catching game for a stupid training for the release of mighty 2nd cheque from NACO to cash in our salaries!!!)

And then there were many such long distance calls followed in at the time of my dinner, during late nite power cuts, in the midst of terrible way-back-work traffic and so on. Some times it was calm n composed leading questions of my tour plan and the final dates and tickets and sometimes over excited assurance of well settled arrangement of hostel-stay-plan by masquerading cousin sis, fights with Super and so on….which all actually
reinforced my trip to Hyderabad, removing dilemmas over logical thoughts of not opting leave at an crucial hour of new project and immense carve to spend an unplugged holiday;
reiterated the fact that I got to go and
remembered me thousand times that two souls out there at distant corner of SSIM waiting irrationally and impatiently for my arrival:
sandeep and ria!!

The official agenda

Confused with the bitter relation with my boss, I was stumbling for an opportunity to grant leave (as according to my boss’s “management theory – “leave isn’t your right but privilege)!! And I was refused to grant leave when asked rationally saying “the reason is personal”. I was told, if really need the leave, you will get it and the “real need” list topped the leave for marriage!! Me the gal, who has not got distant plan for marriage (thanks to my boy friend), got least amused with the proposition contrary to many of my age would, to hear an easy approval of “long wedding leave”!! And thus I had to talk the call saying “I’m actually going to settle my marriage”- to stuff some more pounds on the rationale behind my trip. Well it wasn’t a complete alien scheme: Sandeep being the eligible bachelor with a handful job at HDFC and our freaky conversation over the prospects of our marriage covered up the lie of my official agenda ushering comfort upon my conscience.

The Hug

After settling comfortably at the side lower of Falaknama with a Dan Brown, I overheard some discussions between the pantry guy and my neighbors that the train will reach Hyderabad some 8-9 hrs late and its scheduled like this for a month or so. It was a mere overheard fact but the impact was enormous. I detested literally everything after ensuring the truth of the train schedule!!(I guess those who knows me well will well understand the fact behind my dismayed situation and why can’t I afford to waste a single moment of my tour plan at Hyderabad! I spend counting hours remained for Hyderabad for several hours in the train, leaving aside the interesting encryption of Ensei Tankado!! But it all get dissolved somewhere under the sun, when the train hit the Secundrabad station and I met Ria. Well Sandeep was there too (a bit more handsome than he appeared in the photograph) but Ria, the over excited one as always ,figured me out in the crowd sprinkling happiness in the air and extending a bi….g tight hug, which I never got in my entire life! And it extended so long that finally Sandeep felt left out, which made him speak off “now let it be…and lets go”!!(This actually didn’t make any difference on Ria’s action!)
Well then I hugged Sandeep too which made him crack into a generous smile but his conscious hug without actually touching me gave the back drop of a traditional Malayalam guy, very unlike of another Malayalam friend I know- Bala.

Pubbing

Heading for the Pub so eagerly and making a plan to spend more time over there chucking out Bairaju Foundation visit is the only thing which I am repenting about my Hyderabad trip, specially after the long drawn battle with my boss (and my give in situation) ever since I have come back from there….
But repentance doesn’t faded away the aura of pitch dark pub at city, which I consider as an ultimate couple’s destination, abandoning Bala’s Colaba based happening one, not even visiting it. Apart from the drink and smoke and the silly- life- problems which we enjoyed in the midst of comfortable darkness and loud “Hotel California”, I will always remember the Hot- peeper- Chicken- hunting with the toothpick from the plate with the help of mobile phone back light!!


Golkunda

Golkunda was my only demand and I had to visit that to satisfy my child hood fantasy about this fort. And being the only destination for our photo shoot Golkunda will always carry the traits of my Hydearbad trip through several snaps posted at orkut. I have seen many forts and climbed many stairs to reach the top, but visiting Golkunda is incomparable as till now, I could sense the pulse of very moment spent out there filled with intangible happiness and excitement. Sandeep took the toll of being a guide and was really accurate while giving crappy stories in a confident gesture. We missed the famous Taali point of the fort in search of some unconventional destination in vain and finally before coming out got to see a place, which should be conventionally famous, but to our luck was not.
It was a shabby huge hall just before you step out from the fort. We were pretty exhausted and contended with the happy hour alcohol and climbing top of the fort and merely interested to see any more things, when Sandeep made me stood at an angular corner of the hall and placed himself quickly onto the other end asking me to press my ear against the cold wired wall….” Debo can u listen to me?” “Yup.. Pretty clear” I answered back; startled completely by the architecture of the room, but then there was something more flattering: “Debo will u marry me?”…An ever craving phrase hit upon my ear!! Never in my life have I imagined I would get a marriage proposal like this…. having tryst upon resonance created by some ancient architect for some technology freak Nizam………
I had to conceal my amusement and I had to act smart, thus I popped out a prompt reply- “Oh of course!!” But I wish it was true! Nothing more romantic than this could have ever happened, if only it were my marriage phobic boy friend, instead of Ria’s best Friend Sandeep!!

When our “Mom” claimed ‘I am Single….’

It’s a real fun to see Ria, who has always been considered as Eyya boka ( enormously stupid) among our Kolkata friend, to turn into a responsible being, taking only care of my food, bath water, bus timings and etc. And it was amazing to experience the party craving gal putting a ban on drinks after a mere two pegs and forcing people not to drink more!! The one, who has always made plans for my week ends during her Kolkata stays actually wanted us every time to get back soon from every place we visited; literally making me and Sandeep a pact of rebels!! No wonder we gave her the upper designation like MUMMY!!
But the most hilarious episode was to witness our Mummy’s fight with her boyfriend –Deba (who’s by any chance was not our Papa) and after that her declaration to be single and not ready to mingle!! I am not sure about the period she remained in her very single relationship status, but will always remember the snaps clicked at Eat Street celebrating her single hood!!

Sandeep… I miss the burger

I have never missed a burger in the same way as I did that day. And I never cursed myself before for not listening to Ria’s advice “pack a chicken sandwich for dinner” as I had to starve becoz of all these till 12.30 in the next afternoon.

But I will miss many more I guess….the jacket, which Ria took off from her body to protect me from cold, the full share blanket to cover myself from the terrible high speed fan at the hostel room, the intensity of the hugs, the kisses (which I never got from any of my friend), the untold good bye to sandeep for the stupid punctuality of the bus, the love and concern in the burger for a mere chat friend or a best friend’s friend and….

(lot more , which are actually not palpable to pen down in black and white, which I guess will remain as a bond between us, a resultant path created with this trip….lead towards somewhere deep, intense…… unknown to others…..
Love u guys…a lot!!